PS So I don't break down and Cry
by Noncomment
Summary: P.S Prequel number five, Noin knows the Zech is cheating on her and shes vows to destroy the woman who threatens to take her place, prequel to PS I hate you. 6XN 6X? Read


**Authors notes**: Hello everyone! This one-shot is a **very** important one and directly links to P.S I can't believe I feel in love with you. Also it may be hard to understand if you have not already read P.S I can't believe I feel in love with you or P.S I hate you. Anyway I do hope you enjoy this one. And please **read and review**, I would love to hear from you ^.^ **ENJOY!**

x_x

* * *

P.S So I don't break down and cry.

PS Prequels

AC 201

"Do you know what time it is?" Her arms were folded and disapproval was on her face.

Zechs was late.

Noin realized that regardless of his perfect composure, he held a lack of punctuality, mostly when it involved her. Zechs told her he would be home to help decorate and have a birthday lunch with her at exactly noon. So Noin, knowing Zechs and his time management, got ready at 12:30pm. And now it was rolling around 1:45pm and he finally just waltzed in.

"The traffic was terrible."

With his pathetic excuse.

Zechs walked up to Noin and picked her up by her waist making her squeal girlishly as he spun her around.

And his charming smile.

"Aren't you going to wish me happy birthday?" He then playfully flipped Noin on her back in his arms, his ice blue eyes glistening.

And his heart melting kiss.

"Happy birthday Zechs."

It was all three greeting aspects that Zechs waltzed in with that always made his extreme tardiness excusable. And the fact that he was cheating on her bearable. Noin knew that Zechs was sleeping with someone else; no one can be late for almost every engagement with their girlfriend because of terrible traffic.

They were standing on the porch of Zechs massive garden that she would describe as a lost princess maze. "Are you ready for our lunch date?" Zech placed Noin back on her feet and continued to smile down at her; Noin always compared his smiles to the warmest day in summer.

"Lunch?" Noin straightened out her navy blue Micheal Kors day dress. "It's far past lunch now Zechs,"

"Oh you seem to be right Noin" Zech said as he checked his watch, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"Since we had to delegate the party decorator, I've already had mine while waiting for you" Noin said slightly irritated.

"Oh well in that case I'll go grab a quick lunch by myself" Zech said casually as he began to walk away.

"O-okay" Noin was a little shocked by the lack of argument, didn't he care that he missed his birthday lunch with his girlfriend. "Just make sure you are back to help with the decorating."

Zechs waved his hand back and kept on walking. Noin knew he didn't really like helping with the delegating but he always seemed to really enjoy the parties.

Noin looked down and noticed that she forgot to give him his birthday present. "Wait Zechs your…"

But he already left.

She sighed as she looked over the small box on the glass garden table, inside was GreenShag golden cuff links from the empire collection with a red rose designed on the front. She felt herself smile in accomplishment, Zechs would love these.

Noin looked up at the sky and frowned slightly when she noticed rain clouds in the distance. She sighed looking down at her gift and decided that it would probably be more romantic if she left it on his pillow.

Noin started towards the house when she saw Relena walking through the garden doors.

"Relena" Noin greeted with a smile, she adored Relena, she believed that Relena took after her brother.

"Noin" Relena smiled back embracing Noin with a hug. "You're here early."

"Well yes I want to make everything perfect for your brother's party." Noin said. "He tends to be in a sour mood afterwards so I'm trying to change that this year."

"Oh Noin you really do love him" Relena said with sympathy.

Noin remembered the first time she meet Zechs, she instantly fell in love. All through the war she followed him. She became brave; she became strong, she became like no other woman so that she could follow him straight to the very end, waiting for the moment that he would recognize her.

"I'm glad you're with him Noin" Relena said breaking Noin out of a day dream "I could not dream of a better sister In-law."

"Sister In-law?" Noin asked confused, what was Relena implying?

"Well yes of course" Relena stated "It's about time he started to settle down and carry on the family's name, and he couldn't of chosen a more perfect woman."

"You're not joking are you?" Noin was a little taken a back, was Relena right? Would her dreams finally come true?

"You are a strong woman Noin, you belong with Zechs"

Noin smiled in agreement, she was a strong woman, that's why she carried the name Noin after the war, demanding that even Zechs call her by that name. It was because Lucrezia sounded weak, sounded like a woman who did not know about the horrors of war. And Noin was far from weak.

She remember on the first date she had with Zechs, when she told him she would rather be called Noin instead of her first name, she remembered him smiling charmingly and saying "Then you shall call me Zechs, and it will be just something we share between you and I to keep what we shared through the war alive"

"Thank you Relena," Noin said embracing Relena in a hug, "I would not have dreamed of a better sister In-law either."

Noin was about to say something when she heard a crash behind them.

"Sorry Ma'am!" one of the workers called out.

Relena huffed as she looked at the workers cleaning the newly caused mess. "The help never take into consideration of other people's property."

Noin nodded in slight agreement, although she didn't think the workers did it on purpose.

"I better go stop them before they make a mess of things" Relena added as she narrowed her eyes at one of the maids.

"Alright, well I have a few things to take care of but I'll come back to help later" Noin said as she headed for the door.

"Alright see you later Noin" Relena said as see stormed over to where the workers were, Noin heard her reprimand one of them and sighed. Relena could be a little bit hard on the help sometimes and she never understood why.

Noin turned away looking at the box in her hand and hoped that she would bump into Zechs on her way to his bedroom.

x_x

Noin eagerly walked down the halls of Zechs mansion, she couldn't wait till Zechs open her present, she wanted him to wear it at the Fall party.

As she walked down the hall she noticed the door to Zechs private office was open.

"That's weird" Noin mumbled to herself, Zechs office was never open. He had a strict rule about no one being allowed in his office, and that included her.

She slowed down by the office door and tried to peer in, hoping that maybe Zech was inside.

He wasn't.

She sighed and turned to leave but then stopped and took a step back. Something caught her eyes. Normally Noin would not meddle into other people's business. She was far to secure to even really care. But what she saw in his office made her curious, very curious.

Noin took the tip of her finger, looked both ways down the corridor, and then slowly pushed the door open and slipped inside. She looked around at the luxurious office room and pinned the object she was looking for.

A bouquet of red flowers she couldn't identify.

She smiled and thought; they must be for me. She picked the bouquet of red flowers and noticed one of the branches was missing but didn't think much of it. She put down the bouquet and was about to leave when she knocked something over.

She jumped when it hit the floor and began looking for the item slightly panicked, if anything was out of place Zechs would know someone was in here. When she found the item she looked it over and froze. The item that she knocked over was a bottle of male lavender massage oil already opened and already used.

More proof that Zechs was cheating on her.

She put the bottle back on the desk and quickly excited the office.

And those unidentifiable flowers; were not for her.

Noin stalked down the mansion hall way gripping her gift in hand. She was a strong woman. Zechs loved her and she knew it. There was no one in the world that was a better match to Zechs than her. She wouldn't let this woman take her place.

There was no way she was going to let some little bitch break her.

x_x

"Oh Relena you have done a marvellous job" a wealthy lady complimented. "I just love what you have done with the place."

"Well Thank you, Zechs chose the color scheme but I put it all together."

"Well it's just splendid."

Noin stood beside Relena in a small group of diplomats who were sharing compliments as well as spraying gossip, but she wasn't playing attention. Instead she was looking for the woman who was sleeping with her future husband.

From the moment Noin found the bath oil she had been striking out names of everyone she knew that could be sleeping with Zechs. At first she thought of Zechs assistant Carla, but then remembered that Carla was a little cubby around the waist, and that Zechs was not only shallow but preferred twigs, which forced Noin to consistently watch her diet.

Then the idea the of twigs led her to think of Dorothy, but Dorothy was obviously a Lesbian that had it in for Relena, Dorothy thought it wasn't obvious, but everyone had a clue, at least Noin did.

Then there was Lady Une, but again after the death of Treize, another obvious Lesbian.

But then who was left…there was Hilde, the L2 girl who made it a goal to hit on him at even opportunity. But that was extremely low, even for Zechs.

Noin looked over to see Zechs walking towards them after he finished talking with his best friend Wufei and sighed. She bet Wufei knew who the whore was.

"Milliardo" one of the diplomats greeted "Thank you for another splendid evening"

"My pleasure" Zechs said with a charming smile. Zech turned and smiled down at Noin. "Is that Allen Schwartz ?" Zechs asked motioning to Noin's dress.

"Ah yes" Noin answered as she looked down at her navy blue pleated strapless chiffon crossover gown.

"It fits you beautifully"

"Thank you" Noin blushed; Zech looked handsome in his Burberry beige and violet suit as always. She then looked down and noticed Zechs cuff links, they where a bight violet with a metal rim, and looked considerably cheap. They were definitely not the one she left on his pillow.

"Who gave those to you?" Noin asked as politely, who ever gave him those cuff links was definitely sleeping with her future husband. "Did you see my gift on your pillow?"

"Oh these?" Zechs asked pointing to the cuff links, "I got them a week ago, Ch-" Zechs was about to answer but got distracted but the conversation going on before them.

"Oh you mean the Winner boy" A wealthy man said. "I heard he was having an arranged marriage but he cancelled"

So close. Noin sighed inwardly.

"He is quite different isn't he?" The wealthy woman from before said, "I mean... I heard he prefers members of the same sex."

"I don't see how anyone in this bureaucracy could be a homosexual" Relena commented. "You can't possibly produce an heir with that way a thinking you know?"

Noin stood there idly not paying much attention. She thought that gossip was rather low way of conducting a conversation and didn't understand why anyone ever bothered with it.

And then she heard someone addressed Zechs with an underline insult.

"Milliardo my son, you better not turn out like that Winner boy" The group laughed, Noin shot daggers at the man, to imply that her future husband was a Gay, how insulting. She didn't have a problem with the Gays but this was her Zechs they were talking about.

"Of course not," Zechs answered, Noin looked up at Zechs who seemed unfazed. "That's just preposterous."

"And…" Noin took this opportunity to interject "He has a very promising woman by his side." She felt Zechs wrap his arm around her shoulder pulling her closer to him; she took it as a thank you.

"Oh how adorable" a rich old woman said.

"And how long have you been together?" She was surprised when Wufei addressed her, she didn't even remember seeing him in the group.

"Over six months" Noin said proudly, "We are going on our six months anniversary vacation next weekend."

"I never knew you and Milliardo were dating?" Wufei asked.

"Oh I know Zechs and I just made it recently official." She looked up at Zechs, she was a little shocked at the questioning, not only because Zechs never informed his best friend about their relationship, but by the fact the Wufei just called him Milliardo.

"I know you are his best friend but we decided to tell everyone at the Fall party." She then greeted Zechs with a kiss.

That should show everyone.

"He proves to be a very promising husband for you my dear." the old lady applauded.

Noin smiled at everyone satisfied, but on the inside she was furious. How dare they accuse Zechs of such a thing? He may have long hair, and may have a feminine facial structure but he was far from a Gay. They had sex for god sake.

"If you would excuse me"

Noin was little stunned as Zechs quickly exited the group and crossed the ballroom. Was it something I said? She asked herself. Noin also noticed that Wufei had left the group too, he was probably uninterested by the discussion she thought.

Noin was about to go after Zechs but Relena put a hand on her shoulder stopping her. "You'll make an excellent wife Noin" Relena stated smiling sweetly.

She turned towards Relena and smiled insecurely and put the tip of her finger nail between her teeth, a bad habit she picked up whenever she got nervous, or lost confidence.

"I sure hope so."

x_x

The Fall Party was over and everyone had left, and Noin was on edge, she hadn't seen Zechs from the time he excused himself for the group.

She wondered if he excused himself to run off with her. She remembered last Fall Party Zechs disappeared right after he gave his opening speech, she figured he was tired or something but didn't pay too much attention then because they were not together.

But this time they were together and she had now come to the conclusion that whoever Zechs was fucking must be a woman of low worth or they would have been open about their relationship ages ago.

She briskly walked to Zechs bedroom, having a feeling that he retreated there to practice his infidelity.

Noin rounded the corner, stalked down the hall until she was in front of Zechs bedroom.

The doors were closed.

She pressed an ear against the door.

Silence.

She felt her heart painfully pound inside her chest. Had they just finished and he was holding the slut in his arms like he held her? She closed her hand over the door knob and told herself on three she was going to open the door.

One.

What if I'm just paranoid?

Two.

Will he leave me for her?

Three.

"Noin"

Noin spurn around to see Zechs looking back at her…coldly.

"Zechs I…" she dropped her hand and smiled as her heart rate went down. She was paranoid. "I was looking for you."

"Why?"

Noin froze by the coldness of Zechs voice; he stepped around her and walked in his bedroom leaving the door open. Noin took this as an invitation and followed after him.

She was about to say something when Zechs angrily took off his blazer and threw it on the bed. Zechs was only untidy when he was very upset.

"Are you oka-"

"Yes"

He was clearly not okay; Noin put a finger to her lips and started to bite down on her finger nail. Zech pulled of his shirt with his back turned to her and she noticed the fresh scratch marks. Noin never scratched him during sex.

"Zechs if it's something I sai-"

"I'm taking a shower" And with that Zechs walked into his washroom and slammed the door.

Noin stood there stunned and angry. She was not paranoid in the least bit. Zechs was cheating on her, and it was time she found out who it was.

Noin looked around the room thinking of where she could find evidence, and then she spotted his pants, the one that he wore this afternoon, when he was late.

She cautiously noted how they were neatly folded on his bed and rolled her eyes at the sight, Zechs tidiness and organization sometimes surpassed creepy. She slowly picked up the pants looking over her shoulder towards the washroom. And went through the first pocket.

Nothing.

She then went through the second pocket and felt cotton like fabric. She pulled it out and in her hand was pair of baby blue briefs.

She raised her eyebrows, did he accidently pick these up from the gym mistaking it as his she thought. No, Zech doesn't make tedious mistakes like that.

She dropped the briefs and continued checking the rest of the pocket, but there was nothing left.

She sighed. "This is ridiculous" she mumbled.

Giving up, she started refolding the pants when something fell out of the back pocket.

A receipt?

She slowly bent down and picked it up and read;

Peacecraft Hotel;

Room number; 1265.

Number of guest: 2.

Room Type: Couples suite.

Check in: Saturday 9:30pm.

Check out: Sunday 12:30pm.

She felt something oily under her fingers and wrinkled her noise at the disgusting feel, and then she remembered the massage oil.

She hesitantly smelt her fingers, it smelt like Lavender.

"But this doesn't make any-" She looked at the receipt, then looked at the briefs, then looked at the receipt again, then remembered the oil, then looked at the briefs, and then she felt like she was about to die.

The bitch was a man.

She dropped everything and began to walk briskly out the room, but then abruptly turned around, picked up everything, put it all back into his pants pocket, refolded the pants, smoothed down her dress then bolted out of the door.

She ran down the long case stairs two steps at a time almost tripping on one of the steps and then out the front down. She felt heavy rain beat against her face but she kept on running, she didn't know where she was running to, or who she was running from, all she knew was that she had to get away.

She ran all the way down the drive way to the front gate and yanked it open, continuing to run down the side walk. She felt her head throb, and her lungs quickly lose air, she felt her world spin out of control.

All this time I've been searching for a woman…

Noin's feet pounded on the ground as she tore down the side walk. She ran through puddles, her broken heart pounding.

Just to find out he's cheating on me…

Tears were streaming down her face fogging her vision.

"He's cheating on me with…with" Noin tripped over a bump in the side walk snapping her heel and hit the ground with great force. The rain beat down on her endlessly as she struggled to get up.

All this time…

She clasped a hand over hear mouth trying to stop her rapid gasping, she was starting to get light headed.

All this time it had been…

She took a deep breath looked up to the sky and…

Screamed.

Noin finally broke.

She collapsed to her knees, pounding her fist in the pavement, tears bursting from her eyes.

Zech was cheating on her with a man.

Noin began to gasp for breath as she choked out her sobs. All this time, the man she had been in love with was a Gay and she didn't even realize it.

From the second week of the relationship Noin saw signs that he was cheating. She spent three months ignoring it, and then when she couldn't ignore it anymore she spent the next three months accepting it. Accepting that he had another woman, a woman that she could compete with, a woman that could never measure up to her, she was strong, no woman could break her.

Noin threw a hand over the left side of her chest with a heart wrenching scream.

But a man could.

Thunder roared and lighting struck and she screamed again in unison. She closed her eyes and collapsed to her side, lifeless, motionless, weak.

She felt all the strength leave her body as she laid there on the cold wet cement.

What do I do now? She thought as she limply laid on the ground. She felt lost and tired. She been chasing after Zechs for years just to find out now that it was all for nothing. All her strength for all these years was for nothing.

"What do I do now?" she whispered to no one.

And as she lay on the floor defeated, rain soaking through her skin. She watched as squirrel cheerfully bounced crossing the street, she watched the squirrel pranced happy on its way as if the heavy cruel rain and the loud treacherous thunder could never phase it.

And it was in that moment that Noin found her answer. Found her strength.

She picked herself up of the ground, whipped her eyes, took a deep breath and began her way back to the mansion.

She knew all of what she had to do.

So she didn't break down and cry.

x_x

"Miss Noin!" Noin heard a maid call out as she stepped inside.

"Miss Noin you're all wet" The maid gasped as she called out to another maid for a blanket.

"What where you doing outside?"

Noin looked up at the iced voice that asked the question. Zechs stood at the top of the stair and peered down at her with hard eyes.

"I…" Noin felt something bubbling inside her, she mistook it for anger and tried to hold it in but it was too late whatever it was already explode.

"Oh just I lost something outside" Her perky voice echoed in the large mansion, she bounce up the stairs towards Zechs with the brightest smile on her face. "Silly me didn't realize it was going to rain and by the time I was already out there it started to rain."

Noin was standing in front of Zechs bobbing up and down. "And gosh would you look at what it did to my hair; you know how long it took me to get it to stay to one side?" She was babbling and her hands were flailing with expression but she couldn't stop it "And not only that but I just got my hair done yesterday I don't know how-"

"What happened to your heal" Zech cut in.

"Oh this?" Noin took of the broken shoe and held it up with one finger and dramatically rolled her eyes, "This piece of garbage just broke on me while I was in the garden. God I should have the store sued for things like this, you'd think that they would get those L2 children to spend more time mak-."

"Alright." Zech cut her off with obvious irritation in his voice. "I don't know what you're so happy about." Zech turned around and began to walk down the hall. "But when you're done playing search outside come to bed."

"Okay I will be there in a moment" she sang waving her hand.

"Oh Zechs?" Noin asked, perfect smile still in place. "Did you get my present?"

Zech kept on walking not bothering to look behind him. "Yes."

"Did you like it?"

Zech paused in the hall way spiking Noin's anticipation.

"Yes," and then he continued walking to his room. "However, I hate Roses."

"What? But I thought you loved flow-" but Zechs already shut the door.

Noin stood there perky smile still in place, bobbing up and down like there was no care in the world.

"Miss Noin are you okay?"

Noin stood completely still for a second and reassured herself that she was doing the right thing. She could just easily turn Zechs to the press; destroy him like he destroyed her.

She put the tip of her finger nail between her teeth and began to bite. No she was stronger than that, he was with her which means she had won, and it didn't matter what it took to keep him.

She would laugh at his tardiness.

"Of course I'm okay" Noin said blissfully as she threw her broken shoe to the side, she watch as the maid ran to pick it up and smiled to herself.

She would smile at his lack of interest in bed.

"Arnold!" Noin shrilled, "bring me some tea, I'll have it in the lounge"

"Yes Ma'am."

"And don't make it too hot, and don't let it spill over on the Arabian rug like last time." She huffed, Relena was right; the help didn't care for the property of others.

Noin even would …

"Did you hear about what happened to Quatre Winners arranged marriage?" Noin linked arms with one of the maids and began pulling her towards the lounge. "I can't believe he would turn to homosexuality instead of carrying out his name. I personally don't think it's true, but you never know now a-days."

Sink that low.

"I know he is my friend but let's be frank here, his companies going to fall with that sort of behaviour."

"No ma'am I didn't hear."

"Gosh he reminds me of Dorothy, did you hear about Dorothy Catalonia, Treize Khushrenda cousin".

"No Ma'am."

"What about Lady Bellwood? It's just a shame losing all your families fortune because of one poor investment."

"No Ma'am I didn't hear about that either."

"Well" Noin sat down tapping the seat beside her, she picked up a nearby pen placing it between her lips grinning from ear to ear. "Get us a share of chocolate ice cream and I'll tell you all the juicy gossip"

"Yes Ma'ma" As the maid disappeared Noin sat there laughing quietly to herself on the brink of tears. She defiantly blinked her tears away, and swore to herself that she would never break down and cry again.

She fell to her side and gracelessly prompt one leg on the couch and wickedly grinned.

"Oh and wait till you get a load on Lady Une."

* * *

x_x

_Prequel to P.S I hate you_

**_Please remember to R&R ^.^_**


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